World Wide Open

It's both scary and wonderful to be in a position where the world is wide open to you. When every option is a real option and not just an "oh wouldn't that be nice?". No ties to any one place, no one else to worry about in considering a move, not even furniture to worry about moving.


It's wonderful because ... well, the world is literally open. Anything is possible.

It's scary because ... well, the world is literally open. And anything is possible.

The hardest part is narrowing down the options. And then choosing which option to pursue.

I've mentioned to several people that I'll be leaving Las Vegas in 2010. I've been here - save for a few months here and there - for 6 years. It's C-R-A-Z-Y to think about how long it's been. Definitely doesn't feel like it's been that long, especially since leaving YWAM in 2007. Two years is a long time...but it's literally flown by.

The question everyone asks when I tell them of leaving is "What's next for you?" The only response I can give at this time is "I have no idea." These are the things I will be praying about over the next few months:

1. New Orleans - My cousin and her husband have just moved back to New Orleans to open a community center in the city. I do not know a whole lot about The Center yet, but am excited about the possibilities of "getting my hands dirty" again with at-risk youth and stuff like that. It would also be nice to be in a humid climate again, with rain and thunderstorms and the Gulf so close. I would probably also work as a personal trainer (plan to be certified by then). I would be closer to family and friends.

2. Moving East - generally. Kentucky, Tennessee, Virginia Beach are the three main places I've been looking at, in a general sense. Again, I would try to find work as a personal trainer and basically give myself a fresh start. I would be closer to family and friends.

3. School of the Bible - This is a YWAM school, at YWAM Tyler. It lasts one year and begins in August. I've wanted to take some concentrated time to go deeply into God's Word, and this would give me the opportunity to focus on that and nothing else.

4. Introduction to Primary Healthcare - another YWAM school. It's 6 months, and I could take this course in Montana, Hawaii or Australia. The desire to take this school is tied very closely with Morocco (next option), so I'm not sure how viable this option is at this time.

5. Morocco - no list of options would be complete without Morocco, even if I have let it go. I still believe that God has called me to Morocco, but it became an obstacle, which is the opposite of what it should be. So I let the dream of Morocco die, and will pick it back up only if God directs me to do so. My life is still completely open to going, whenever - if ever - He says go.

6. Children Around the World - This is a dream that has started brewing, that would involve myself and a team of select others. I'm not inclined to go any further into it than that, as it is still just a developing idea. :o)

So, there ya have it. Lots of options. Lots of possilities. Lots of decisions. LOTS of prayer. :o)

Savoring in 2010

So, it's here. A new year. A new number. And believe it or not, the first day is already almost over. You know...they say "Time flies when you're having fun." I think that's a ridiculous statement. Because time flies whether you're having fun or not. Remember when days were slower? Things weren't so fast paced, so frantic... I miss those days. I think about the small town I grew up in and wonder if time still takes its time there, or if that small town, too, travels at the same breakneck speed as the rest of us.

I wish time didn't move so quickly. It makes it so hard to savor each day. I guess the trick is to pick parts of the day to savor, rather than expect to savor the whole shabang.

So, what are you going to savor tomorrow? January 2, 2010. What about that day will you savor?

Personally, at least to start, I'm going to savor the 1 1/2 hours I have between waking and leaving the house for work. Shower, cook/eat breakfast, make/drink coffee, pack lunch, harvest cranberries on Farmville, have some devotional time. (Not necessarily in that order.) No one else in the house is awake. It's very quiet and relatively dark. Peaceful. Routine. Comforting. It's a wonderful way to prepare for a hard day of work (which is definitely what tomorrow will be). I've never really done it with an attitude of savoring...but tomorrow morning, I will intentionally savor each second.

Savor moments. Don't let the fast pace of life these days rob you of joy in the little things. :o)

Happy New Year!

Thoughts on a book...

Went to the library yesterday, and got a book called "Thirsty" by Tracey Bateman. Published by WaterBrook Press, a Christian publishing company. I grabbed it because, shocker of all shockers, it's a novel with vampires in it. A Christian novel with vampires in it. Wondering how in the world the author did that, I decided to read it.


And couldn't put it down. I just finished it.

The story is about Nina, a woman who started drinking as a child, because her father was an alcoholic and left booze all over the house. Curious, she would take drinks here and there, and by the age of ten, she was a steady drinker. By her teens, she was an alcoholic. This led to a wild graduation party, an unfortunate incident with sex after a lot of alcohol, leaving town the next day, a pregnancy, a daughter, eventually a husband and another child, staying sober for years, then falling off the wagon and ending up divorced, without custody, and in court ordered rehab in her late 30's. In a nutshell.

The vampire is in the story, but not the center of the story, although he deals with his own addictions, one being (obvious) blood, two being Nina. He found her the night of the graduation party, and instead of feeding on her, he left her where the cops would find her, so that she would be ok. He stayed in that town for 17 years waiting for her to return.

After rehab, she returns, to start over. They strike up a friendship, he never harms her, and ends up sacrificing his own life to save hers when an evil vodoo witch vampire comes looking to reclaim him as her long lost love. End the vampire part of the story. (sorry to spoil the ending)

The book really is about addiction. And there are some thoughts in it that I wanted to write down, so am doing this to share.

"One thing she'd learned - she could stand alone. She battled her demons daily, and so far, every day she was winning. It wasn't easy to make good choices when she'd been making poor ones for so long, but with each right decision, she gained the strength to forge ahead to the next right decision. And even though sometimes the path twisted and she took a step or two in the wrong direction, getting back on track was becoming easier and easier. She'd made the decision to be strong and confident and to find serenity."

That's the last few paragraph of the book, with some mushy reconciling with the ex husband stuff taken out. It resonates with me.

And the author's words after the end of the book:

"With so many inside and outside the four church walls addicted to prescription medicines, street drugs, and alcohol, I knew I would find a readership that understood what I was trying to accomplish. To show that we have power inside of us to overcome. To rise up and say, "Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world" (1 John 4:4 KJV). Addiction is awful and hard to overcome. But there is a truth that in my own clumsy, imperfect, human way I tried to show. Perhaps the Veggie Tales characters sing it best: "God is bigger than the Boogeyman." What is your "I can't"? Whatever it is, I hope you will dive deep, all the way to the real you - perhaps even to depths you didn't know existed - and pull out a strength you didn't know you possessed."

Hmmmm. Makes ya think. The part I bolded...especially. Who is the real me? Will I ever find all of her? I've scratched the surface...but will have to go - as the author states - to depths I didn't know existed to find all of her.